Monday, November 7, 2011

Day 7: Making family time is important to me. How do you balance your children, relationship, and work life? (Guest Post by Ricki Lake)

Oh Ricki, you annoy the hell outta me.
I never liked your show, I feel Jerry Springer is actually Grammy worthy compared to how yours was.

Why do I detect snark in your voice, Ricki as I read your guest prompt? Your condescending tone, puts me off.

How great, family time is important to you Ricki, I'm guessing you do not have any teenagers yet?

Well quite honestly Ricki, I do also find family time important.

Yet, I also find making time for myself important.  I have lived for the past 16 years making everything we do about the kids, pretty much.  Family time was all the time.  There was no real balancing getting done.  I have been a stay at home mom for the last 16 years.  The balancing part was maybe trying to get some me time so I could use the bathroom.

Then I made the somewhat crazy decision to home school two of my kids that took at least three years off my life. 

I have not been living "balanced" until this past fall, when all of my three sons went off to school.  Wow, this has opened an whole new world for me.

I have three sons, ages 16, 14, and soon to be 10.  Let me just interject this:
Now before you go thinking I am a a mean mean "Mommy Dearest" I beg of you to consider, have you ever spent an extended period of time with a 14 year old boy?  One that has a puppy who needs to be taken outside every hour, and the said 14 year old boy wants to argue about it?  One that has been recently telling "untruths" about whether or not he has Math and Science homework?  One who's life mission it is to only play Modern Warfare 3?
No seriously my 14 year old is not out of control, he's going through puberty.  And, yes, it is making our family time, a variable hell on earth.

We are hoping that he will come together hormonally soon and we can get back to having important family time with no incessant arguing.  Or where I may actually want to come out from hiding in my bedroom and possibly have a conversation with no yelling involved, or where I don't have to ground anybody.

Yes I love them all, but some days loving them seems to be difficult rather than easy like when they were 4.  Where all of the world's ills could be cured by nap time. 

As far as how I balance my relationship, my husband has a business he runs from home, he can be found pretty much at all times in the shop in our garage.  Sometimes it becomes unbalanced say when he wants me to drop what I am doing and make him a sandwich. Not that I am against making sandwiches, but he seems to want them at the most inopportune times.

My job balance, I don't have a job, yet, I do have a big job.  Thankfully that job no longer includes trying to school educate two teenagers.  I have thought somewhat, about going and getting a job, now that everybody goes to school.  I have come yet to no conclusions about doing that.  There is after all, always another load of laundry to be done, another window to be washed, another few abandoned socks to fish out of the couch, and another hockey practice to drive a kid to.  I'm thinking that is job enough.  And the business phone keeps ringing off the hook, so for now I'm sticking with the only job I have.

How's that for you Ricki?  I can't wait to read some new  prompts by you when your kids are teenagers.  

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